A Harry Dinner Potter Party.
It’s been a while since the event, but I’ve been itching to tell you about our Harry Potter dinner party. It’s totally a poached idea after I heard the inspired story of my friend Heidi co-hosting a Beyoncé dinner party amongst friends. I wanted to be her. But I’m not sure I’m young or edgy enough to channel Sasha and all her fierceness through the medium of dinner, and I’m just the right amount of a Harry Potter keeno to churn out a good pun.
Basically all you need are tolerant friends who will dabble in and tolerate an appropriate amount of fandom*, the love of a good pun, and a certain culinary flair. Add to that Chris’ freshly caught squirrel, and you’ve got a particularly unique event. Unique doesn’t always mean better.
I felt that the puns were enough on their own, so fancy dress was optional, but not encouraged. Ergo, we dressed as muggles. Some may have looked like wizards trying to dress in muggle clothes, but that’s largely due to my housemates’ koinonia style. For decor Chris printed off the emblems of Hogwarts’ houses and we hung them on the washing line. That was as close to the Great Hall we’ll ever get at Number 25, and I’m comfortable with that. And midway through the meal different guests threw in some dramatic readings. Most were from Harry Potter, but Francesca’s addition of a reading from Jennifer Aniston’s Unofficial Biography by no way detracted from the event.
The menu. Food was definitely selected by the quality of the pun rather than the food, but actually tastebuds were adequately teased. Apart from the Professor Squirrel dish. It’s not that it didn’t taste ok, it’s just that it pushed the novelty into the weird zone. Great pun though.
We started with canapés and butter beer. The butter beer was heroic. It actually tasted like your imagination tells you it’s going to. Niki and Mim blended a genius concoction of beer, cream soda, butterscotch sauce, and ice cream. We nobly decided to not pinch any wizard food from the books like Chocolate Frogs or Every Flavour Beans, but stick to the pun-based dish. Butter Beer was our only exception. If we didn’t include Butter Beer there just wouldn’t be any point, really. The canapé selection was eaten at ease in the garden** and was an ample choice of:
Rita Skeeta Pitta Chips
Tomato Marvelo Riddle
Spinach World Cup
Goblet of Fire
And. Professor Squirrel. I might just stop talking about him now.
Main course? Two options. MacGonagoulash. I know right? Pure gold. Tasty too. But for me, the pun de resistance has to be the veggie option. ROAST UNICORN. And don’t worry, no unicorns were harmed in the making of this dish. Just the butternut squashes whose entrails were replaced with a couscous stuffing. And an expertly carved parsnip to fashion a horn. *Waits for internet to give us a standing ovation*.
Pudding was a fine selection between Lavender Brownies, Albus Crumbledore and MacaRons.
But the divine secret to a themed dinner party has to be the cheeseboard. We were obviously too full for the cheeseboard by this point, but in the name of squeezing every drop of Potter puns from an evening we fully went for it. The Chaource of Secrets, Weasleydale, Krumembert, The Gouda of the Phoenix, Sirius Blacksticks Blue, and finally*** BRIE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED. All enjoyed alongside a nice mellow glass of Voldaport.
You may now want to be my ‘in real life’ friend all the more. Or you may be glad that I am tucked away in the desolate north east, and can only hope I get fracked soon****. However, I cannot recommend this as a way to pass an evening enough. A beautiful homemade and weirdly English evening. I will definitely theme a dinner party again. My line up of theme ideas include Michael Jackson, the Bible, Roald Dahl, boy bands, and of course, children TV shows from the olden days.
*Too much and it gets weird, not enough and they think you’re weird.
**Until the remnants of Professor Squirrel were pointed out.
***Insert drum roll.
****Political humour that sounds ruder than it is.